Crescendo
Full HD and super 8mm transferred to full HD, color, stereo, 14'04''
Starring: Dahlia Bloomstone
This eternal grandeur and tranquility seems to be achievable only in my absence... A petite black-haired girl can never belong here...
— No, tell the truth!
Let's try again: the statement I don't belong here is just a cover-up for my narrative doesn't belong here, or more fundamentally, no matter how hard I tried, my language doesn't belong here. So I invited an artist friend who embodies my admiration, envy, and desire. Once worked as a SWer, she was always seen by clients as a symbol of innocence.
In our brutal honesty, through our gazes and mutual instructions, we closely experience each other's anxiety and fear of loss. Allowing her to portray me and feel my pain—is it literary translation as a political act or just a one-sided, frivolous fetishization of tragedies?
“这教堂里永恒的壮丽或宁静，似乎只有在我不在场的时候才能实现… 那个娇小的黑发女孩永远无法融入这里。”——不，告诉我真相！
从头说起吧。“我不属于这里”的说辞只是掩饰。实际上，“我的叙事”才不属于这里。或者更根本地说，无论我如何努力，我的母语都不属于这里——谁要在缅因州的深处听用中文讲述的悲伤呢？因此，我邀请了我嫉羡的艺术家朋友：在过往做脱衣舞娘时，她总被客户视为在地的“天真”象征。
在我们残酷的坦诚里，我们彼此凝视、抛出指引，又走进彼此的焦虑和失落。让她扮演我并感受我的痛楚 —— 是演绎“文学翻译总是一种政治行为”，还是我一厢情愿又轻佻的，对悲剧的恋物癖？
